By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
