I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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