I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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