don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize