ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize
