i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
