**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize