Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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