I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Randomize
