walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize