when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Bring me that man meat
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
