Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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