the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize