I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
