the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
