Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.

(231): View more from Michigan

better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(910): View more from North Carolina

I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.

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(816): View more from Missouri

At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.

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(443): View more from Maryland

She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?

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