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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure

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• (805): View more from California

  my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad

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• (228): View more from Mississippi

  Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.

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  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust

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• (210): View more from Texas

  It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.

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• (636): View more from Missouri

  I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Drank your wedding present. Sorry

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.

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