I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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