im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I'm getting married
To pizza
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
