I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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