They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
