i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize