My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
