Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
