so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
