He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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