Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
how drunk are you?
Several
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
