I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
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I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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