I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Couch. On fire.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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