He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
