no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Randomize
