the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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