yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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