I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize