Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
We talked him into tasing himself.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
