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let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
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