AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
