I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
