dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I will pee on everything he values.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Pants are for mortals
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
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