Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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