i need an iv and a liver transplant
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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