just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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