yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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