im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
