The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
