Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
