I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize