So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
