And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
