Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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