Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor