Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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