she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
